Real Housewives O.C. : No Hate
Ok…naming an episode of this show No Hate is hilarious! Hate runs through their plastic veins! But I digress. This episode start off with Peggy spouting out all the things she practices…lots of ologies and pilates and yoga, and now plastic surgery. It appears to me that this isn’t a first time visit, so let’s see what she has to say….2 breast procedures and the surgeon shoots her a compliment about letting children get their breasts done. GAG!!! Keep in mind Peggy is holistic but will shoot man made toxins into her body. OXYMORON or just plain MORON! What is she going to get done this time? Replaced implants that are roaming around her body. Her husband is an idiot. Boobs are like pizza, there is no such thing as bad pizza. I guess he hasn’t eaten domino’s pizza.
Gretchen is planning her huge surprise 40th anniversary for the parents. She is having a dress made for her mom. She is using the concept of a trip down memory lane as the party theme. She breaking into her mom’s closet to steal a dress. Holy Visors in the closet! Why do women in California think stilettos and shorts look good??? They are in a time crunch and Gretchen is looking at how bad her hair looks today….Priorities.
Don and Vicki are chatting about the trip to Mexico and the never ending saga of the Tamra/Vicki relationship. They really don’t have much to talk about these days….Family dinner tonight. Vicki is micro-managing how Mike cooks the steak. 17 minutes each side with the lid closed, this is a new way of doing it. Just eat a friggin’ shoe. That steak is going to taste like shit, but Vicki will spin it that it is delish! Brynn is a nurse but can’t get a bundt cake out of the pan…won’t be happy is she is my ER nurse and I am in need of stitches! We learned that Vicki works til after 1AM every night. Vicki’s steak theory blew up in her face…the steak burned and of course it is not her fault. Mike wants to smack her! Vicki is complaining the kids are never around but keep in mind she is always working…Then Don says she is never home and says it with defeat in his voice. I just want to give the guy a hug. Why is he with her in the first place? What does she have to offer? She is an ice queen. The kids feel bad for him. She justifies being at work because they have beautiful things and Don says well you are never around to enjoy it. Love it! She focuses on what makes her happy. SELFISH BITCH!
Tamra the switch hitting cougar is doing a photo shoot with her lesbian trainer friend Fernanda for the NOH8 campaign. They are shirtless in jeans. She is sooooooo in love with herself and such a damn TEASE! Fernanda is quite smitten. She admitted to dabbling in the Vagina pool. I wish she would drown in it.
Peggy is taking her infant daughter to see her agent. Child models….really? peggy wanted to be a supermodel but she didn’t have the height….or the face for that matter! She stayed in LA to do sportwear/swimwear modeling. London is instructed to walk like a Diva…she is freaking 3. The kid didn’t behave her best because she is 3. Not looking like a model. Peggy is dying inside. Peggy brings up the post partum depression again…get over it. Modeling doesn’t cure post partum.
Gretchen is at the Jewelers. She is taking her first engagement ring and making her mom a new ring. Isn’t that something you wouldn’t do? A jinxed ring from a failed marriage and give it to your mom??? How about cashing it in and paying your past due taxes with the money. Her dad is onboard with the idea…what a cheap bastard!
Alexis is in traffic trying to get in touch with Gretchen and leaving a message about her party! A relaxation and rejuvenation party. Tamra asks if Vicki is invited. Why would Alexis invite her? She hates her. Tamra begs her to invite her, I suspect for back up. Alexis is going to have her kitten claws ready!
Tamra is moving into her new place and Eddie is helping! They are packing and grinding. He asks about Cabo and she tells him she did body shots…hoping to turn him on. Fernanda is having a citizenship Party and really wants to have Tamra there but she is moving. Fernanda is pouting because Tamra is moving on the day of her party. Her friends are bad mouthing Tamra to Fernanda because she didn’t schedule her move around the citizenship party. Wahhhhhh. The party starts and Tamra is not there yet, she is making out with Eddie on the porch. Tamra blew it off and Fernanda is not happy. Tamra is looking at stuff with Eddie, wedding dress, wedding candle, prom pictures, ex husbands….Eddie wants it thrown away. Jealous! She needs to part with it but she isn’t ready to. He leaves her in the garage to clean up her past. Tamra turns on the fake tears and acts like she is upset. She throws the wedding glasses in the dumpster and wipes away the tears. Such drama!
Alexis has her big party….she has gifts because she likes to give. Botox and champagne! Tamra is spouting about how Gretchen ruined her party and will not let that happen again. Tamra picks up her back up Vicki who is ready to get rid of the icky feelings she has had with Alexis. They have mace and are ready for anything! Do they really need a limo??? Tamra is such a little victim. Whatever. She can dish it out but not take it. Fernanda shows up and so does Peggy. Botox is on Alexis tonight. Alexis is kind of perturbed that Tamra and Vicki are late. Vicki is pissed because it was a work day. Peggy starts spouting out astrology. Gretchen has a sucking aura. According to Peggy. Whatever. It starts off pretty good. Peggy is talking about being with a guy 3 years younger than her and tamra is talking about her man that is 5 years younger. Both of their men are soooo hot. Well not in everyone’s eyes. Alexis is getting her injections…she is howling like she is giving birth. Fernanda tells Tamra she is disappointed in her and Tamra is on the defensive. Tamra is looking for sympathy and Fernanda isn’t giving her any. Holy tension. God is Tamra a pain in the ass. She is really a good pairing with Vicki. Peggy has gravitated to Vicki and is sucking up to her big time. She almost throws Alexis under the bus. Peggy is treating her like she is the pope. Alexis is perturbed and rightfully so. Peggy loves Tamra. Looks like the party was a success. No fighting until they are about to walk out the door and Tamra mentions she didn’t have to use her mace and everyone must have taking their meds. Gretchen was cool and handled It well. Alexis was pissed and wants all the stupid catty behavior to stop. Kudos to her. If Alexis didn’t have so much botox we would have been able to tell she was upset. Next week should be a doozy!
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